WHY CPL IS NOT FOR ME

WHY CPL IS NOT FOR ME


Its on your twitters, instagrams, snapchats and facebooks… CPL is happening. Whether it's happening today, tomorrow or only on the weekends I couldn't tell you. Heck, I don't even know what CPL stands for. What I do know (I think) is that it involves the ridiculously exhilarating sport that is played at Sabina Park. Which by the way I had no idea was located down the road from the Mercedes showroom until a year ago. Also, the sport (cricket) I described Earlier as ‘exhilarating’, me doing that, that was shade in case you missed it. The thing is the only thing I know about cricket is that my granny enjoys watching it on TV, listening to it on the radio and talking about it with anyone who will listen. But it's in receiving a phone call while in the car on my way home from a marketing company bullying me into taking up their offer to attend and write about my CPL experience, that I realised just how much I really really don't care. On one hand I'm thinking why not just take the money and run. But on the other hand I can think of a million other things I’d rather do than join the pretentious cohort of millennials who snapchat their way into sabina park to watch hours of hard ball and bats fly, just because they think that in this moment that is cool.

 

Can we talk? Cricket and beer goes hand in hand but sadly Kingston Belle and cricket and beer does not. There's no way in hell I will die knowing I used my platform to help recruit millennials who read my blog to join in on wasting three or so hours of their young lives watching something as positively anticlimactic and bland as cricket. If in fact you are a part of the percentile of Jamaicans who actually know and enjoys cricket, then thanks for reading this far but you should probably find another post to read. Don’t leave though, we can still be friends! just don't bother trying to convince me that this is a Jamaican thing and blah blah blah. Because unless you can assure me that Jamaica, West Indies or whoever our team is will win then I’ll stick with not caring.

 

The purpose of this post is not so much to stop the presses and announce that I'm all of a sudden a different more honest person with integrity and morals and Kingston Belle is all brand new and whatever. Even though that doesn't sound all that bad come to think of it. But if we’re being honest, this post is about playing by my own rules and endorsing things I actually care about while at the same time allowing my readers the opportunity to do the very same thing. It’s also about telling these brands to suck it with their bipartisan support of what I do.

 

So to be clear; no I don't wish to join the cadre of instagrammers and snapchatters who think the coolest thing is posting about how fabulous of a time they’re having at CPL because it plays right into their imaginary world where they sit sideline like Kim Kardashian and watch sports happen or play or take place or whatever the doing word is. No, No No! I want to stay home in my underwear and continue to scroll past your hashtag cpl posts rolling my eyes in the process and liking only memes and beach pics because i'm bitter I'm better and I'm over faking it.

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